The 21 Day Rhythm Reset

Day 17: Accept Your Reality, Transform Your Reality

Listen here (speed it to 1.5x if you're like me!)... or read below!

Last fall, my husband started having to travel for work again. We share one car and live about 2 hours from the nearest airport.

So one particularly long trip, we planned for me to go pick him up in the big city so I could also do a big Costco and Trader Joes haul (we live in a town of 3000 in the mountains of Colorado).

The plan was for me to put Wyatt down for a nap, and then his grandparents to come over and watch him until we got back.

I was definitely feeling a sense of urgency because I wanted to run all the errands before Jesse landed so we could just head home after.

And Wyatt... who was at that point great at going down for a nap... was OF COURSE not having it the day I actually really needed him to.

For 45 minutes I frantically tried every trick in my bag to get him to sleep.

Finally, I realized that maybe I was the problem. I accepted that I might not get to do what I needed to do... and then I relaxed and was just present with him.

No joke... within 10 minutes... that little boo boo was fast asleep and I was on the road.

I think one of the biggest killers of our daily peace as parents is trying to control what is often not in our control. And as much as people like to think they can... you can't control another person. They are the one flying their plane.

The interesting thing is... any time I try to control I'm frustrated and disappointed, and anytime I'm flexible and accepting of all the things that are out of my control is the moment they actually seem to go better.

There's a daily devotional called Simple Abundance that I read 10 years ago and am re-reading again. One of the entries talks about acceptance and I'm going to excerpt some lines for you that have been really powerful for me in making the unpredictable rhythms of life with young children easier to adapt to.

The author writes:

“What is acceptance? Acceptance is surrendering to what is: our circumstances, our feelings, our problems...the delay of our dreams. Over the years I have discovered that much of my struggle to be content despite outside circumstances has arisen when I stubbornly resisted what was actually happening in my life at the present moment.

I have also learned that when I surrender to the reality of a particular situation-when I don’t continue to resist, but accept- a softening in my soul occurs. Suddenly I am able to open up to receive all the goodness and abundance available to me because acceptance brings with it so much relief and release.

It’s as if the steam of struggle has been allowed to escape from life’s pressure cooker."

I love this analogy because I think a lot of parents would describe how they feel as being in a perpetual pressure cooker. A lot of parenting info makes it feel like if you just do the right combination of things, everything is going to work out how you want. But when you have a human child, with a million variables and their own free will... that's a belief that is going to keep you in a crazy pressure cooker feeling like you must be doing the wrong things.

Today I encourage you to take a breath and accept when your baby wakes up from a nap after just 15 minutes... or they play for 5 and can't seem to be away from you.

Accept... and see what happens.

Even if it doesn't magically resolve your situation every time, it will transform how you feel every time if you let it!