The 21 Day Rhythm Reset

Day 18: Ancient Tools for Modern Parents

Listen here (speed it to 1.5x if you're like me!)... or read below!

Yesterday we talked about accepting reality when things are out of your control.

But today I want to give you something a little more "productive": two "tools" that humans have been using for thousands of years to take care of their children and get things done.

The first is babywearing. You may have done this when your child was an infant... but I'm pro baby-wearing as long as you can carry your child and they enjoy it.

Wyatt is now around 30 pounds and if he is in a fussy mood one of the first things I do is throw on the carrier, put him in there, and go on a walk or even go about my business cooking or cleaning (it does have to be something active).

It is truly amazing how well it works to reset his connection button AND allows me to not feel frustrated that I have to stop whatever I was doing. Because I don't stop what I was doing if I don't want to. And usually after 10-15 minutes in the carrier... he's playing again.

Make sure you invest in a good carrier because taking care of your body and your baby's is very important. Instagram account Letstalkbabywearning is an incredible resource for this.

The second tool for sustainable parenting is Baby-Led Play...of course. I know I talked about it in week 1 for how it supports what research says is most important for baby's development... but it is also incredible for having a sustainable rhythm to your day.

The key with non-mobile babies is setting them up with their play mat wherever you will be. In the living room folding laundry, in the kitchen next to the island where you're chopping vegetables... in the basement while you work out.

The key with mobile babies is allowing them to go off and play, and then come back and connect and even "help" when they need your attention.

If you read the book, Hunt, Gather, Parent you'll learn that this is the norm in most non-Western cultures. Children play independently without adult direction OR intervention, but adults welcome them to participate whenever they engage rather than shooing them off.

It's like a beautiful, effortless dance of existing together in a rhythm of off and on connection. And children are reportedly more helpful, independent, and have higher reported mental health in these cultures.

We can do that too if we are willing for things to take just a little longer. Look at the chores you set for yourself to do today. Now set your baby up so they can play near you. See how long the dynamic dance of exploration and reconnection lasts and bask in how nice it is to not feel the need to be "on" all the time.

You may wonder- how do I teach my baby to play without me or initiate this rhythm? That's one of my favorite topics... and one we'll cover tomorrow!

P.S. Logistical note: I save all my focus-intensive activities like computer and phone stuff for when Wyatt is napping, and all my active household management stuff for when he is awake.